Do you wait for other people to make decisions that impact your life? Are you a mindless eater or snacker? Do you find yourself validated by how many "likes" your photo or post receives? Does that afternoon coffee or evening wine feel like a must? Is your schedule very full of appointments or projects for other people? Do you find yourself wishing that people read your mind so you wouldn't have to say what you really think?

If so, you may be suffering from Empty Stomach Syndrome (ESS). ESS is the result of relying on other people and stuff to complete us. ESS is common in busy women who have a hard time establishing, then prioritizing their needs and wants. Women who struggle with life / balance issues can be especially susceptible to ESS.

But there is a cure for ESS and it doesn't involve a prescription. It involves a shifting of your gaze from external to internal. From people, stuff and situations to you, you and YOU.

You are the source of everything you want in your life.*

No one or no thing can give you love, satisfaction, happiness and success. Too often you expect someone or somethings to fill a void(s) within us. That results in a rumbly, grumbly stomach (ESS) that doesn't ever shut up, usually because you're feeding it the soul-crushing version of Twinkies. You need the real stuff that comes from inside of you, not outside. Relying on others to complete you (even your partner and especially your kids!) is like relying on someone else to choose your major in college. Sooner or later, the outsourcing will catch up with you and it likely won't be pretty when it does.

Is ESS an issue for you? What void are you trying to fill? Leave me a comment below or over on my Facebook page.

Thanks for reading. If you like this post, click the heart icon below. If you really like this and want to hear more, please subscribe to my weekly newsletter which comes your way every Wednesday.

* Want to learn more and how? Come to The Pandora Passport starting Tuesday October 20.

A golden can of tuna, a tangerine notebook, a pair of pink sneakers and a teal desk.

What do these four things have in common?

Each can be a motivator for personal change. The objects themselves aren't necessarily special. In fact, they are pretty ordinary. So, how can they motivate personal change? Color.

I've been trying to eat more protein recently. But there's something about the process of getting to the tuna salad that always feels like too much work so I usually skip it at the store. Getting an car opener, opening the can, mixing it up, rinsing the can, refrigerating the end result, etc. Argh, too many steps! {If you're reading this and think, "Wow, lazy," I completely hear you but stay with me for a minute.} A can of Bumblebee tuna with a shiny golden label caught my eye last week. It wasn't a new brand and likely wouldn't even taste different but it's color made it stand out. I grabbed it and decided to try. Half-expecting the can to contain some treasure other than tuna, I opened it when I got home. Of course there was nothing but tuna inside but somehow it tasted delicious. I've been steadily making tuna since.

My tangerine Moleskin notebook motivates me to use it for lists, add to-do's, jot down quotes I like, future ideas, anything, everything. Exactly as it should. A client who has never been a fan of exercise bought a luscious pair of hot pink sneakers and has been at the gym ever since. A teal desk at TROSA caught my eye a few weeks ago. It wasn't even in good shape but it was so beautiful that I knew I would sit at it to write if only I had it.

Colors, like scent, can elicit strong personal feelings for us. It can motivate, inspire, embolden, excite, pique our curiosity or...shut it down. And of course color doesn't only bring out the best in you; it can also work the opposite way. The dark red boxes of truffles that Whole Foods stacks in tempting towers around the holidays, for example, can rocket us to a sugar high for an entire afternoon. That's unhealthy personal change. But in and of itself, color can be a very powerful tool to motivate positive personal change.

In what area of your life do you need extra motivation? Think for a moment. Then imagine what color-related change might get you moving. Stuck? Email me (outsidethemombox AT gmail DOT com), leave a comment below or on my Facebook page if you need some ideas. Thanks for reading.